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We Can’t Stop Aging – But Let’s Do It Fashionably and on Our Terms

By Jude Walsh March 05, 2025 Mindset

I don’t mind getting older. I see it as a privilege and want to appreciate it fully. Yet, I find myself pushing back against things that “old” people do. For example, I have now experienced two eye surgeries.

Fighting Terminology

Note that I said “eye surgery” and not “cataract surgery.” I realized that in my mind cataract surgery sounds like an old person kind of thing whereas eye surgery has a younger ring to it. Perhaps like Lasik surgery to avoid wearing glasses.

When I went into my surgeon’s office the afternoon of my operation to have the eye patch removed and for a post-op check, I burst into laughter. There, in a row, were nine people with patches on one eye.

The silver hair, or no hair, of the folks lined up in the waiting room had me thinking: Face it, Jude, cataract surgery IS done on older people.

Great New Vision

I always try to find the sweet spot in any experience. The upside of this one is that now I can, for the first time in my life, drive without glasses.

This is a marvel. I was used to turning my head and neck to get full perspective as I drove because my frames limited my peripheral vision. Now I just turn my head slightly and can see so much more – a definite perk!

I have also committed to not balk before any experience from now on, even when something makes me feel sad or miserable.

Needing Reading Glasses

The downside to my eye surgery is that I can no longer read without glasses. My prescription lenses were bifocals, but when I was in bed with the book on my chest, I could read without them. I am grieving this loss.

So how to turn this around? Well, my prescription glasses were about six hundred dollars a pair. Thus, I only had two, and only replaced them every few years when my insurance would partially pay for new ones. To economize, I always selected a frame that was not too trendy so it would last longer.

Readers, on the other hand, can be found as cheap as a dollar to $25 a pair. I can choose frames to match my outfit and they can be as trendy as I like because they are easily replaceable. This is a clear upside and a balm to my desire to look stylish.

A New Problem Arose

But, as it happens, I wasn’t used to readers. I kept losing the darn things. Unlike my prescription glasses, which I wore all the time, I only need these for close work. I am constantly leaving them somewhere. In the first two weeks I misplaced four pairs!

I tried the neck chains, but can you think of anything less fashionable?

The Right Solution Always Exists

Imagine my surprise when I went shopping in my favorite boutique and saw this very creative magnetic eyeglass holder. It’s held by a pair of magnets and doesn’t damage my clothes, even silk blouses.  

These holders come in a variety of shapes and colors: hearts, fleur de lis, crystal stones, starfish, turtles, an artist’s palette, and more! I think they’re a brilliant and fashionable idea for those of us who manage to lose our readers much too often!

Adjusting to a New Type of Aging

I am gradually adjusting to needing a pair of readers on hand. I have about a dozen now, placed all around the house and in my purses. I am still shopping; I found a gorgeous teal blue pair today.

Dr. Christiane Northrup, who wrote Goddesses Never Age, says we are all growing older, no control over the calendar, but we can make choices as to how we age. I am aiming for gracefully, in excellent health, and with style! How about you?

Which body changes do you consider a certain sign of age? How do you change your perspective when it comes to how you age? What tools have helped you make positive choices to age gracefully? Please share your thoughts with our community!

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Christy Piszkiewicz

Loved this article 😁

Jude

Thank you, Christy!

Liz P.

Loved this article (please do post the magnetic glasses device-thingy so we can all go out and feel immediately better! I’m only half kidding–I do want to try that; it sunds great). Glad your eyes are better, Jude.

I like so much about aging. I am now unflappable. If I get mad these days, which rarely happens, it is about something worth getting mad over. I’m a lot steadier and savvier than when I was young. I also put up with very little (ok, almost zero) BS from people, so it might seem as if I am less likeable. But it’s actually less people-pleasing.

Which is great! What I do notice, on the down side, is that I cannot run as fast, swim as far (or as fast), or do as many push ups and sit ups as I used to be able to do. But I still fit well into my college clothes—the ones I was wise enough to keep, anyway—and I can still ski down a mountain, even if I take it very easy now in long slow crisscrosses instead of trying to go faster and faster, zipping straight down. You get more time skiing this way anyway.

I have fewer but better friends. I have more money and more time. I have a true love and chosen partner, instead of a dutiful marriage I’m stuck in because of the kids. I’ve given up and let go all the people who aren’t “happy and positive and smart and funny” as Ina Garten’s famous quotation says, and I have let go of even some close family members who are ungrateful takers and drama-mavens, including a very ungrateful and toxic grown child. That’s sad, but I’ve got no time left for bad relationships.

Aging is fantastic, so far. I know that eventually it all has to end, and it’ll probably involve sickness and misery and pain at some point, possibly some severe and ugly stuff. But overall, at 66, I really wish I could have gotten here to this secure and happy place a lot sooner.

Last edited 1 year ago by Liz P.
Jude

Oh, Liz, you sound so centered and so fun! Letting go of people is difficult for me, too. But, when I know I should and I don’t… I regret it. Here are five magnetic glasses holder choices. Three are from Amazon and two from Etsy. I found these by searching “magnetic eyeglasses holder for women.” I hope you find something you love!

https://www.amazon.com/MANZHEN-Vintage-Magnetic-Eyeglass-Brooches/dp/B01IV8NNTW/ref=sr_1_58?crid=3LR74T46U25GT&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.lSKr1KYWH0Jj_26ege4c9HDWgb81NOXThED_3rVJdFIqInAV4ti5qcexQvqWgJi8UrEF50EXGDK2SDr-8pObWZ_nDiXTwrwyWjqCYvEUdqtJu1oeul5DPPdzOjj8-_0DUzbIuXppj1kW4Z71ea6T50x6lKyPy9nsUvO8gpCnZtzvNi_t0vPvoNFT8XnvcryEoS7ZokDhwdKtFZHtyYu0mkFfh0aecA_3uYRJnVntClh-qiVuBC1U-UkwgwcCEiX88weCVNjXp1qk-0NdtrWF53bAGbjUmICI_6TcacRbT02w9C1vv9jYOKiuvd_UCsM5FC7eb_c2dF9hC3ja3FqfpnZiQp28xo-m2rfX1Oh1fzpUmmu2l_4SBA6lu_yUy2_iiJSU1HEl-Bsmpxvcho2Yl18DHa5gqoescR6l3Tk6osrQsYL1BHhO4iCqyLBIRz2J.fNlpogPIS5c-b3nd7WGNiAbYHCRSbB9I1e1HBtb-LpU&dib_tag=se&keywords=magnetic%2Beye%2Bglass%2Bholder%2Bfor%2Bwomen&qid=1741650989&sprefix=magnetic%2Beye%2Bglass%2Bholder%2Bfor%2Bwomen%2Caps%2C137&sr=8-58&xpid=bp-sYGEq7X96L&th=1

https://www.amazon.com/SenFai-Halloween-Magnetic-Eyeglass-Holder/dp/B015NUIBIY/ref=sr_1_76?crid=3LR74T46U25GT&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.C3AREH4G2cFE0ImaWm_TUxGTZQmlIYU_NYK1lTWeFWP7O1muLOaj4bOvwgSea6BC9EDdKGL4Y8s8tzHvDix0nxjYryXr2EuLoh1RxAsv5BtJu1oeul5DPPdzOjj8-_0Dit8U6YWb1GLWcF2e6NFO_KXEWgZPj-B4wds8xTfr3YUG3EZiYnodx5UNItxkGL6AAUCt4AmrceffJQdqa7pTRJqd6P5TUYWkgKDVxB6ie5vWo8E1uOXHMdJxJPiEQIShwHTdHZE8r4Yn21bCsr2oIrXO2aFQmMQkU4IcVzF9ZFyVuAYZEjZuNmWqVQbAUsunN40KMgrRTbJWCrsR5BDuCTUZzbz_nwBhMtjyua2rgDVX-4xGBmcUBaqRCX20MpN4SD-tMf4TmbgiCZ-9-g6M1-Z6CUdR-g7jUgP-1N_UKvud8XseAU7C9viFg5gttRNZ.sRy20udpgHg0kjt0Wgn8evO5HKfRZG6MfhjREmr9ExE&dib_tag=se&keywords=magnetic%2Beye%2Bglass%2Bholder%2Bfor%2Bwomen&qid=1741667257&sprefix=magnetic%2Beye%2Bglass%2Bholder%2Bfor%2Bwomen%2Caps%2C137&sr=8-76&xpid=bp-sYGEq7X96L&th=1

https://www.amazon.com/NOUMANDA-Crystal-Magnetic-Eyeglass-Holder/dp/B06XXYW1K4/ref=sr_1_99?crid=3LR74T46U25GT&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.w1L4jaOMo80vc311sNK3bKMTPs5LqJat6Alv3bCnoM5INvXnEtnAlhQEJ_GusxExdC48cJe1elois2i9f1KxRqil06ygMNinp5WDk9Vw81DrjAuI13wzKZwgVdxUydG1SGK4IO5B8xrr2Rc6ZQY4g7-IDe3u3gCqTXTD_H3vFp9gl1_YLpgcNm-TQl8i99xYfktpZuGvVZ9DkUXuFKSCIPeU1SpDGhKCFzqso_CasyYSKLPIWkzCB5Psccj8cKAk8DVjcoIfI9W5u4K0IjMAc_SLyRkE0BqmdrzZ01qv32mcffGJgsHFP2VAWlG46GJDymJ2bmIfIzo_baqHGC6rRwrLtOz2-CRVnZkUazdXWHwR8qsqOIAehUtrhdSfxKYQBsfQxqrx743RxwJRc5YkjyCD8swJrJr2V3pNYI5MBXCu9UQ2f2QxgiWBywyPflL1.RVpcW__y_RNyw_vs-L-PUEMhsaipDAzuTjLVczU7u-8&dib_tag=se&keywords=magnetic%2Beye%2Bglass%2Bholder%2Bfor%2Bwomen&qid=1741667367&sprefix=magnetic%2Beye%2Bglass%2Bholder%2Bfor%2Bwomen%2Caps%2C137&sr=8-99&xpid=bp-sYGEq7X96L&th=1

https://www.etsy.com/listing/839879848/carnelian-red-eyeglasses-readers-or?ls=a&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=magnetic+eyeglasses+holder&ref=sc_gallery-2-1&sca=1&search_preloaded_img=1&plkey=66ea5f918290268788c4d55f17aaf9520335ed3c%3A839879848

https://www.etsy.com/listing/781476412/unique-magnetic-clip-with-2-snaps?ls=s&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=magnetic+eyeglass+holder&ref=sr_gallery-2-21&frs=1&content_source=40a66f4a82c8b3ae669a6692ca9defc24b5f885a%253A781476412&organic_search_click=1&logging_key=40a66f4a82c8b3ae669a6692ca9defc24b5f885a%3A781476412

Liz P.

Thank you, Jude, both for your kind reply and for these great options! Wish we were closer and could go have lunch sometime.

Linda

I have multifocal daily wear contact lenses, but I have to wear +1.00 glasses to read with them as I have an astigmatism in one eye. I also have varifocal glasses but can’t read with them so also have a reading prescription. On a recent trip to the optician I asked to go back to just a distance prescription and a reading prescription, she said I might regret it. Lol, now if I wear the distance prescription I can’t see what’s on the table for dinner when I look down. The perils of being in my early 60s!

Jude

Perils indeed! I love your humorous perspective :-)

Linda

I try very hard not to be concerned about my age number. I had cataract surgery two years ago at 71. Every morning when I wake up to see the trees on the mountains or leaves on the trees and read street names easily, I thank God and my surgeon. I also try to help people I know overcome their fears of this procedure. It’s easy and so worth it. Just trying to be the best and most productive I can be.

Rita Boone

I am very nervous about cataract surgery. The thought of someone poking at my eyes is terrifying.

My doctor mentions it every year, but I can still see great with my prescription glasses. I’m 67 and I want to put it off as long as possible.

Jude

Rita, I understand being nervous about surgery. If it helps to know, both of mine were surprisingly easy. My Doctor answered all my questions, and the surgery itself was fast. You’ll know when you’re ready :-)

Jude

Linda, I found the surgery easy too! Good thought to encourage others who might be nervous about it.

Amy Brucksch

Would you please send a photo or link for the magnetic eyeglass holders? I have a need for those!

Liz P.

Same here! Please a link or a name we can ask for or search. Thanks!

Jude

Check my above response to Liz P. I posted five links as well as the search term. You’ll have plenty to choose from. Have fun shopping!

The Author

Writer and Creativity and Mindset Coach Jude Walsh, EdD, helps artists develop a thriving practice. She aids women, post-divorce or at a turning point in their lives, to identify and create their optimal new life. She is the author of Post-Divorce Bliss: Ending Us and Finding Me. Please visit her at www.secondbloomcoaching.com

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