Have you experienced a time in life when you felt lonely, unloved or undervalued? If so, you are not alone. All of us have felt this way at one time or another.
Like millions of women from our era, I didn’t always love who I was. Despite the success I had achieved in business and acting, I undervalued myself. Along with a sense of feeling I did not fit in with others, there were prolonged periods of my life where I felt unloved.
I don’t regret these experiences because they served as the foundation for me to refocus and renew my life later on. Even so, I do wish I had a roadmap with specific steps I could have followed that could have steered me inward on a more consistent basis.
Going inward is where daily practices of self-love take place. For many people, this is difficult to do because we have been taught to seek our solutions for love, happiness, and fulfillment outside of ourselves.
To help you with your inner journey, I will share 10 steps I have used over the years as a roadmap for learning to love yourself unconditionally.
This article and the accompanying video are part of the series “The Art of Self-Love After 60.” In this series, we are focusing on new ways to stimulate love, happiness, and pleasure on our own terms.
If you haven’t followed along, you can find the previous articles here:
#1: 7 Steps to Turn Up the HEAT on Your Love Life
#2: 10 Easy Ways to Love More of Yourself
#3: 7 Pillars of Becoming Your Own Authority on Love
Women of all ages can benefit from cultivating a strong sense of self-love. The unique life experiences and challenges faced by those of us over 60, however, requires particular steps and specific considerations.
This is where the healing power of slowing down and putting yourself first comes in.
This may sound easy until you consider most women of our generation were raised to be people-pleasers which meant we took on a lot of responsibilities. To do this well we got really good at multitasking and staying busy.
While it may feel good to be of service, the more we neglected our well-being the more our emotional, mental, and physical health suffered.
Making life-altering adjustments, such as slowing down a potentially busy and overwhelming schedule, is one way that you can start loving more of yourself. Another adjustment is putting your wants, needs, and desires first.
Contrary to what many people believe, self-love is not selfish. At this stage of life, putting yourself first is less of a luxury and more of a necessity.
Here are 10 proven steps for loving yourself unconditionally after 60.
This step is about reflecting on your life journey, the challenges you’ve faced, the victories you’ve achieved, and the wisdom you’ve gained. Accepting and loving these parts of your life helps you lovingly and compassionately embrace the new you.
You cannot love yourself if you’re tearing yourself down. Think about all you’ve achieved and the challenges you’ve overcome. Recognize and celebrate your strengths, talents, and accomplishments.
Responsibilities for other people may have led you to put your passions and interests on the back burner. Now is the ideal time to reconnect with hobbies or interests you love.
Loving more of yourself often means learning to say no when necessary and prioritizing your own well-being over outside influences.
Explore where you can be more creative. Begin by tapping into your childhood imagination and allow yourself to go where your creative flow takes you.
The physical and emotional changes that come with age can be challenging. Therefore, embrace all levels of change as a natural part of loving yourself unconditionally.
Prioritize your mental, physical, and emotional well-being. This can include self-care activities like meditation, yoga, breathwork, exercise, reading, or even pampering yourself with spa days.
Challenge and reframe any belief that no longer serves your well-being. Whenever you catch yourself thinking negatively about yourself, replace that belief with a positive, loving affirmation.
Loving more of yourself is about opening your heart, but you can’t do this if you don’t have an open mind. Seek out information about new ideas and activities you haven’t engaged in but have piqued your interest.
For me, daily journaling is the key to all self-love practices. It silences your inner critic and brings you into harmony with your true, authentic self.
Successfully putting these steps to use in your life comes down to taking one step at a time. Don’t overwhelm yourself by trying to do too much at once.
Loving yourself unconditionally is not a quick-fix. It is a life-long process. It requires time, patience, and consistent effort.
Whatever steps you take along your journey, be sure to have fun. For what is the point of loving yourself unconditionally if you are not enjoying your life to the fullest?
I invite you to join me in the video where I share four bonus steps as well as guide you through a powerful three-step self-love action item.
Do you love and appreciate yourself? How do you show yourself unconditional love? What hinders you to love yourself unconditionally?
Tags Empowerment
Hi Joanie, I’m so glad I saw your post. Before I found you, I posted my blog on menopause and the changes it creates in life. I write about having to find love for myself. Thank you for being so passionate to help all of us.
I’m loving my life and taking advantage of everything that comes my way. Instead of seeing an overweight body, I think I’m fortunate that I can go to the gym and tone up. I take full advantage of spa days once a month. Self love and self care are not selfish, it’s important to put my mental, emotional and physical health as a priority.
“Have you experienced a time in life when you felt lonely, unloved or undervalued?” At 73 it has hit n hit hard