This morning, I walked out onto my lovely balcony garden with its potted plants and herbs alongside some colourful patio furniture. This small seating area with its stellar views has been my happy place during the hot summer months, and I’ve enjoyed many morning coffees and evening glasses of wine here.
However, after an abrupt weather change that has brought cool winds and an over-abundance of rain, the flowers and herbs on my balcony now look tired and wilted, to say the least. This morning, I debated whether to get a large garbage bag and haul out my wagon from the storage unit and take everything down to the garbage room in the apartment where I currently live.
Am I just tired and being lazy, reluctant to do the necessary tweaking and pruning to restore my garden? Do I just want a quick and clean fix? Do I believe that everything can bloom again in this late summer season? After all, it is not autumn yet!
While pondering these thoughts, the early morning sun came out and I focused on my beautiful vibrant pink geraniums. I counted several new buds on each plant. As we gardeners know, geraniums often maintain their vibrant colour into the cool autumn days, weathering storms and rain, sometimes even an early snowfall.
“Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.” – Albert Camus
Realizing it was too soon for me to give up on my little garden, I hauled out my downsized gardening tools and began pruning all of the plants and herbs, discarding the unsightly dead branches and sweeping up the debris. The result was a smaller and neater space. It looked good and I was pleased! Later that day, I again sat out with a glass of wine and admired the view, happy that I hadn’t given in to my lazy side!
I couldn’t help but make the comparison to life in my seventies. Sometimes I just feel lazy and want to give in to my arthritic aches and pains, sleep in and lounge around in my pajamas. But just like my balcony garden, I know it is too soon for this!
I need to continuously remind myself that there is still life out there – friends with whom to connect, yoga classes and long walks to enjoy, good food and wine to savour, day trips and some new adventures to explore. It just takes a little more effort these days.
It is too easy to give up. Yes, I am often tired. Yes, I have health issues. Yes, I am on my own and often feel lonely. But inner loneliness isn’t always filled by being with people. Perhaps what I am really lacking is a sense of purpose.
One year ago, I sold my lovely home and downsized to a beautiful top floor apartment. My home had always provided me with activity, structure and purpose. But it was just getting to be too much for me. Renting a smaller space has allowed me the time, freedom and money to re-awaken some old passions such as travelling.
So, for my 70th birthday, I booked a 4-day bus trip to the Ottawa Tulip Festival in my home country, Canada. It was spectacular! The entire city was vibrant and alive, not only with tulips and gardens and blossoming fruit trees but also with people, markets, restaurants and cafes. All the things that bring joy to my heart and soul!
The best part of the trip, however, was that my confidence in travelling solo returned. Prior to the trip, my mind was filled with “what-if’s.” What if no one talks to me? What if I have to eat alone? What if I feel anxious in the hotel room at night?
My fears were soon alleviated. Bus trips always draw a lot of senior women travelling solo. I quickly met up with a group of women older than myself, some with serious health and mobility issues, but all still had a vibrancy and a zest for life. I was inspired and took note!
Short trips and even day trips feed my soul in many ways. Sight-seeing, learning, meeting new people and sharing new experiences bring joy and happiness to my life. The new memories linger, and they fuel my motivation to plan my next trip; however large or small.
Like my late blooming geraniums, we must not give up when the skies turn gray and the rain and winds dampen our spirits. There is still a whole world out there to enjoy and explore, even if it is on a micro level. I believe we can bloom again in our 70s. It just takes a little (or a lot) more effort these days.
How would you define blooming in our later years? What kinds of activities bring you joy and happiness at this stage in life? How do you get through the lonely times?
Tags Inspiration
I loved this article. I am a former dancer, and was very athletic. Sometimes it’s hard for me to reconcile that at 72, I just can’t do what I used to be easily able to do. But I’m starting to realize that I still can do so much, both physically and mentally, and it is OK to modify your activities to your age and abilities. What doesn’t help is frequently seeing articles and stories about women in their seventies, going rock climbing, or flying around for aerial yoga, or still biking through the mountains, or starting a new business in their sixties or seventies. Like that wouldn’t be hard or stressful, or sucking away all your time. This article made sense. Accept what you can do, and do it for your enjoyment.
I love how you phrased this, Irene – “Accept what you can do, and do it for your enjoyment.” Great advice!
Hello Irene from the United Kingdom I am the same age as you I agree with you wholeheartedly, thank you for your wise words
kind regards
philomena
I have gone back to a love from my high school years. Theatre! I act, dance, sing and am on the board of a Shakespeare company. It has brought me new fun and adventure. And wonderful friends! I’m 68 and just got into acting again two years ago. I stage manage as well and volunteer for donor galas and garden parties.
What a great way to stay active, make new friends, and provide cognitive stimulation. Bravo, Jeanne!
Thank you for this encouragement! I am retired, 71 years old and feeling a bit isolated and limited by fear to try new activities. It does take much more effort these days to achieve what came so easily with an abundance of energy. I am inspired by your determination to not give up on your garden oasis. It seems like it was worth it. I also like the idea of taking day trips to mingle with other solitary women. Laughter, fun, and exploring new locations sounds emotionally and socially fulfilling. Thanks again for sharing!
Thanks for your comment, Shirley. On the day trips, we single women find each other! Sometimes it’s scary to walk up to some singles or couples and say, “May I join you?” But everyone always says an enthusiastic ,”Of course.” And then the conversations begin …
Wow, Ottawa my hometown.
i had a sexual awakening in this decade after my husband died and a former boyfriend came back into my life. He died over a year ago.
A great book is Sex After Grief by Joan Price.
Thanks for sharing, Jane, and also for the book suggestion.
Hi Karen, thank you for your lovely article, I really enjoyed reading it :). As a fellow writer for Sixty And me, I often feel inspired by other writers and the community. Two years ago I decided to travel the world on my own for the same price as renting a small apartment and living in the UK. It was the best decision I ever made! Keep on being you and making wonderful memories. Love Lily x
Thank you, Lily! What a courageous and ambitious endeavor, travelling the world on your own! Where can I read more about your travel experiences? Karen
Such an inspiring article. When everything seems so much of an effort it is really worth finding the motivation to get out of your jammies, off the sofa and explore your world. thanks for reminding us
Hi lily, I would really like to learn more about your world travels alone.. I’m originally from the uk too…please reach out to me. Ps I’m 58 yrs young !