Should I Quit Facebook? Here’s How to Decide
I joined Facebook in 2008. Making connections was exciting and, in the early stages, anyone with a pulse was quickly a “friend.” That boy in my 8th grade algebra class who I vaguely remember? A friend. The woman I met at a local event? A friend. My cousin I haven’t seen in 20 years? A friend. It was an exciting time and making connections felt good.
Some 350 friends later, I often toggled between staying on Facebook and quitting the social media platform. I know I’m not alone. We weigh the pros and cons. We pledge to spend less time scrolling through the lives of other people and more time living our own life. Finally, we set resolutions to start new hobbies, learn new things, and nurture real relationships through tangible connections.
Yet, year after year, we stay. We love the good and tolerate the bad. But, maybe, just maybe, it’s time to step back and make a conscious choice to either stay or quit. Five years ago, I chose to quit this social media platform and haven’t looked back. For you, your choice may be different.
To help you decide, I designed this handy-dandy flowchart as a guide. (If you click on the chart, it will open a .pdf file for you to view or download.)
If You Stay
You’ve thought it through, and you’ve decided to stay on Facebook. At this point, build on what you enjoy about it. To make Facebook great again, you have to be part of the solution, a role model. Here are some pointers and ways to keep it healthy.
- Find the right balance by setting time limits and making sure the other aspects of your life are front and center: your relationships, work, hobbies, sports, and interests.
- Model good Facebook behavior by not ranting, posting fake news, participating in time-sucking vitriolic debates, etcetera. The timeless CNN article, The 12 Most Annoying Types of Facebookers, provides a comical read.
- Remove the app off your phone to remove the temptation to mindlessly scroll.
- Unfollow or unfriend people who continually post content that annoys you.
- Unfriend folks who you really don’t know or care to spend time with. I call it the Grocery Store Test. If you saw someone in the produce aisle and you were way over by seafood, would you go out of your way to talk with them (time permitting)?
- Do not feel obliged to “like” statuses that you really don’t like. The Facebook algorithm is set up so that what you like will appear more on your newsfeed.
- Subscribe to a high-quality online or print newspaper that ranges from the skews left to neutral to skews right range (chart here). If you’re getting your “news” from social media, you may be getting inaccurate information.
- Consider your interests and like/follow their Facebook page. Their content will then appear on your newsfeed. For example, if you enjoy travel, follow Conde Nast Traveler, Travel + Leisure, and Budget Travel.
- Make sure your privacy settings are set to your liking. Here’s an informative guide from Techlicious entitled, The Complete Guide to Facebook Privacy Settings.
If You Quit
Breaking any habit takes a bit of effort, with the first few days being the hardest. Some folks find it easier to leave Facebook if they’re on another social media network like Instagram. That was the case for me. I found Instagram to be a better fit for me and having that alternative made leaving Facebook easier.
To take a trial run, you may want to deactivate your Facebook account. Deactivating is temporary and gives you the flexibility to come back and reactivate your account if you choose. While your account is deactivated, people can’t see your timeline or search for you. (How to deactivate.)
If you choose to permanently delete your Facebook account, you can’t regain access if you change your mind. Before you delete your account, it may be worth downloading your Facebook data, which will include things like birthdays and photos. (How to delete.)
Once you’ve quit Facebook, use this as an opportunity to do more of what you enjoy and discover a kazillion other things to do. Read a book, go for a walk, play a game, call someone, start a hobby, cook, lift weights, create something with your hands, have lunch with a friend… the possibilities and experiences are endless.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
How do you feel about Facebook? Have you thought about quitting Facebook, or do you love it?
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I quit years ago-I didn’t want to have an unnecessary place where my information could be hacked or have the government and others trolling through my “stuff”. I don’t miss it however my HOA uses facebook as a way to pass on info and my aunts and uncles use it to keep the family informed. I have friends in my neighborhood who alert me to the info I need and I never hear from the extended family…but that’s ok.
I really enjoyed Facebook for the first few years (I joined in 2009). Over the years I’ve scrolled and posted less and have deactivated more. There’s a few groups I check in with, and there’s a kazillion photo albums on my profile. Otherwise I’d probably delete. I find FB more annoying than entertaining and uplifting, especially since the outcome of the 2016 election…and it’s only getting worse.
Interesting article. My career was in Silicon Valley so I jumped on FB in the early 2000s, excited by new and shiny stuff. The goal of FB, as all social media, is to keep you there (stickiness), which sounds vaguely of manipulation. The computer scientist Jaron Lanier (who coined the term VR) wrote Ten Arguments for Deleting your Social Media Accounts Right now. After that read, I shut down my FB account and picked up Alexandra Stoddard’s Gift of a Letter and started writing a few letters a week. Many friends sent me email thanks (in spite of the irony of that) but to keep a valuable style of communication going, we have to adopt it. A good deal of social media is at odds with print, privacy and a refusal to react to every little thing.
i have fewer than 20 friends right now; all but one i know in person somehow. and that one knew my daughter and sil in the military – that daughter and sil live out of state. i can see the grands growing and celebrate technology that keeps us so close, regardless of the miles. when my friends hit 30, time to cull the lot
i roate groups i’m interested in – usually have 1-12 that are active and keep my feed filled with things i like. one post that hits me wrong, and i’m getting out. life’s too short, and there are too many other groups and interests to stay where i’m not liking content somehow. i like a lot of art pages and nature, of course
so i don’t feel a need to quit; i keep it pretty well in check
When my millennial son told me that Facebook is little used by his generation and the younger generations, it surprised me. Now to receive an eclectic and more democratic audience one has other options. Not only that, after scrolling for some time on Facebook, I was left with an underlying sense of emptiness, not a feeling of connection. Quit FB and Instagram in 2019 and never looked back.
It was reported in Britain a few years ago, young people were leaving FB in droves because their parents and grandparents were using it so it was no longer cool.