My 5-Step Guide for Dealing with Aging
I can’t remember who said that “aging is not for the weak.” And if you think about it, that’s very true. In working with hundreds of women over the age of 40, I have learned that the aging process affects every woman differently.
Some gracefully slide into it and effortlessly maneuver through it. While others begrudgingly accept it but not until all attempts at denial are exhausted. You are most likely somewhere in between and struggle with it just like the rest of us. Perhaps my aging issues are not the same as yours, but we are all on the same journey.
I’ve put together a list of my top five tips to help women not only embrace the aging process but to thrive during it. I believe that you have the power to make this part of your life joyful and fulfilling. You might be tired of hearing this, but a positive mindset and other healing techniques will make this transition easier and more meaningful.
Accept Your Age
Accepting your age and where you are in life will set you free. By doing so your life will start to improve. Being in denial about your age is unhealthy and it’s keeping you from accepting who you are. Denial takes a lot of time and energy away from you enjoying life.
Yes, our bodies are changing and not necessarily for the better. But look at what we’ve accomplished and the wisdom we’ve picked up along the way. I think that is far more beautiful and valuable than the trappings of youth. Learn to embrace your age and see your own beauty in all its forms.
Own Your Own Story
We hear this a lot, but at this age you get to tell yourself your story. Not your mother, not your sibling, not your boss, not your partner. YOU. If you had a terrible childhood, for example, you could look at that story and feel you were a victim and got hurt, or you could look at the exact same story and feel that you learned how to forgive with compassion.
Where thoughts go, energy flows. When you own your own story, you realize you can create a new one. This time of life is the perfect time to review your story and choose to make a better one going forward.
Face the Difficulty
During this stage of life many women don’t find joy in the same things they liked before. Are you no longer happy with where you’re at in life? It is very common to feel as if everything you knew has fallen away.
Accepting that your life is different is the first step to heal and deal with it. Denial will only keep you stuck and keep you right where you are. If this time in life is difficult for you, accept it and know that it is okay.
Not only will you be stronger from that one simple act, but you will be empowered to do something about it. Taking the first steps will make it easier to connect with people who will understand and support you. And that’s what we all want, to be seen and heard, especially during the worst times.
Quiet Your Mind
The noise NEVER stops unless we make it. You do not have to go into a cave, or even a retreat, but you MUST quiet your mind so you can hear what your soul really wants.
When you decide to change, there are many alternatives available to you, but you’ve got to get quiet enough to tune into them. Set aside even two minutes and just sit and breathe. If you can do more, do more. It will always empower you, I promise.
Choose to Be Grateful
The number one fastest way to change your life is through gratitude. In midlife, we have a lot to be grateful for and have lived long enough to have regrets. Both are true. We can choose to see all the blessings, gifts and abundance in our lives, or we can see how difficult, full of struggle and broken we are.
We are conditioned to see the negative, it’s how we’re all wired as humans. But we can change our wiring. By adopting and committing to a practice of gratitude, you will build a strong foundation of goodness. I cannot express to you how much I mean this – gratitude will change your life for the better.
It will literally make you see the world differently. It will make you see opportunities and possibilities where before you saw dead ends and failure. It will make you see love and compassion where before you saw hate and bitterness. It will make you feel more contentment in your midlife than you ever thought possible.
I hope that you feel more empowered than before and know that you are not alone. We are all going through similar issues and need to help and support each other. If you are really struggling with this, please seek a mental health professional or a support group of other amazing women.
Aging is a big part of this stage in our journey. But we have the strength and tools to help us through it. And in the process learn to love and accept ourselves more than ever. That is truly the most beautiful part of the journey of aging.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
What do you find most challenging about the aging process? Are there any areas in your life that you think have improved with age? If you could, would you go back in time to your 20s or 30s?
Yes, sixty was my problem age.
I still have an ageless soul inside me and can’t get used to the sagging aching meat suit I am now living in.
But thanks to this website I am now 61 and getting used to it.
Now if I could just get my granddaughter to stop asking how blooming old I am……………….
60 was my problem age too! 10 days prior to my birthday I had to have a radical hysterectomy. As it was in the middle of the pandemic it felt like a switch had flipped and I was entering old lady territory.
I had to work on myself, reminding myself I had much to be grateful for as I’d overcome an aggressive form of breast cancer in my mid 40s.
I’m now at ease with my 60s, my sister has just turned 70 and shows how to get on with life as she never stops..
A wise comment about “accepting that life is different”. I’ve recently thought about activities I used to spend a lot of my spare time enjoying—browsing at shopping centres, going for day drives etc—& that I’m not doing these things much any more. I have realized & accepted that my interests have changed.
I would not go back to my 20s or 30s if I had to live them now. They were fun in the ‘80s & 90s, but this world is now too competitive, filled with narcissists and information overload.
60 was the hardest birthday for me and I had never had issues with aging prior to that. Now I’m 62 and I see myself visually aging faster than in any decade prior. I’m also feeling it in my body. Amazing how fast life changes. Nevertheless, I am grateful to still be here and grateful for the people in my life. But I don’t like the new wrinkles or the tummy bulge! Haha.
I hear you Karen. Just as in our adolescence, our bodies are changing. My wrinkely parts aren’t my favorites but at least I can remain neutral, and find
an appreciation for their function and many years of service.
I am 65. I feel it a lot in my body because my job involves a lot of standing and stooping and non-ergonomic sitting. I’m retiring in March 24 and hopefully my body can recover and deage.