I was living in Mexico in 2022, contemplating a return to the U.S., when my sister emailed asking if I would be interested in a derelict hunting shack on the property abutting the family farm where she and her husband live. She suggested that it could probably be gotten for the price of removing it, and sent pictures.
It was unfinished and had been abandoned for years. Inside, a stained, mouse-eaten upholstered chair, a stool, a table on metal posts bolted to the floor, strings of flypaper black with dead flies, and leftover trash from take-out meals left me wondering who had occupied this place. The one large window was broken. Pink fiberglass insulation sagged between the studs and a plywood ceiling and floor completed the ambiance. It was not love at first sight. But she said the structure was sound and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. That 440 sq. ft. building had potential.
There were other considerations. It would mean a move back to northern Minnesota winters. The farm was hours away from any of my daughters. Not only that, it was 40 miles from the nearest town with a grocery store. But after the traumatic years of Covid and the marauding monkeys in Bali, and nine months with 160,000 other people in the high desert city of San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, the remote isolation of the farm spoke to me.
Several weeks later, I was talking with a creative designer friend about my ideas. He listened to me gush for about three minutes, then said, “Honey, you can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear.” I was completely taken aback and before I could even think, I responded with an indignant, “Just watch me!”
That was three years ago. Now when people walk through the front door of my transformed hovel, their jaws drop. I’ve been vindicated!
I had a vision. I focused on it. I believed in it. No one else could see past the existing, sad mess.
That happens in many different ways by well-intentioned people in our lives, especially as we age. Some folks seem to know so much better than we do what’s good for us. But they can’t see inside our heads. As I started sharing my vision, I could have been influenced by the skepticism of friends. Based on their warnings, I might have scaled back my expectations and settled for something far less than my dream.
Fortunately, I listened, evaluated their advice, took what made sense because some of it did, and created a home that thrills me over and over again.
Even if others cast doubt, believe in yourself. Dare to go for the silk purse. Maybe for you, that means travel, or writing a novel; better yet, a trilogy! Maybe it’s getting involved with a theater group, learning a new language, or starting your own company. But be prepared for a few Negative Nellies to cast clouds of gloom over your shiny, new idea.
You’re retired!
You’ve earned your rest!
Why would you want to complicate your life?
You don’t really want to do that!
You won’t have time for your grandchildren.
Are you sure you have the energy?
Have you talked to your kids?
Is your (husband, wife, partner) on board with this?
Don’t argue with them or try to defend yourself. You know your limits. Just smile and go about doing what you want to do. There’s way more potential in most of us than we’re given credit for. The fact that our birthdays have entered bigger numbers shouldn’t diminish our desires, or the courage to act on them.
Are you fired up about a special dream? What is it? Does it take a lot for you to hold fast to your dream? Have you heard any feedback that you used to achieve your dream?
Tags Empowerment
I have been very fortunate. I have traveled Europe alone for many years. Two years ago I went to Portugal and fell in love with the country. I have been planning for two years to go back and buy a derelict house and transform it. I have a lot of skills that I can still put to use. At 63. I am not done yet. In two months I’m traveling to Italy for two weeks. I’m not going with a group, nor am I going with Family or significant other. I’m just going. We need to remember that even as older women, we still have the ability to get out there and do what we want to do . People will say no no no it’s too dangerous. I have friends that have said that and I just laugh. If you don’t take chances in your life, you aren’t living. The world is open go out and explore!
For those who think it’s too dangerous, it is. For those of us who hunger for adventure and have a lust for life, danger means something else. For the adventurous, it is more dangerous NOT to follow our dreams than it is to focus on whatever might be lurking in the bushes.
Oh, how true that we make our own futures! Way back in the early 70’s when it was almost unheard of for a young unmarried woman to get a mortgage in her own name, I did. I ignored all the negative advice from “friends” and naysayers and bought a brand-new condo for $26,000 in an upscale CT town. It was scary, I must admit, but I was a trailblazer among Baby Boomer women and determined to make it on my own. That decision turned out to be the best one ever, and I never looked back or had regrets. I built up a lot of equity and was able to purchase a single-family home that I presently live in and plan to until the end. So, ladies, at any age, just go for it!
Wonderful! Young women often face the same kinds of ‘unhelpful’ advice. You trusted your intuition and went for it and what a great payoff! Thanks for your comment!
I love this article. It is very inspiring. Most people think that once you are retired that is the end of the road, I believe once you have a vision and a seed is planted in you . Go for it !. Take calculated risk though.
Retirement can be the best time of your life! It has been for me. The freedom it can offer especially if you’re in good heath, allows for opportunities that may not have been possible if there were other obligations.
It would be nice to see some before and after photos.
That’s another story once the new addition is completed!
It’s amazing that I came across this today. This morning I read an article about a woman who bought two salt shacks in Newfoundland and renovated them. I recently befriended a man who told me about the “fishing shack” that he owns in Newfoundland and he is not able to visit it again. Crazy. What is the universe saying to me? HaHa. At least a visit is in order…
Well, Margaret, synchronicities like that are no accident! Especially in this eclipse season it’s important to pay attention. It sounds like it may be time for you to take on a challenge, and only you know what that might be!