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“I Would Love to Sing, But I Don’t Know How to Start!”

By Barbara Lewis July 01, 2024 Hobbies

As a long-time performer and vocal coach, I have heard these words spoken many times, especially after one of my concerts or talks. These days, during concerts, which have taken on a more conversational tone, I often mention the great pleasures that singing can bring – no matter your age or level.

And science agrees. In the study, The effects of aging and singing, research has discovered something that many of us already knew in our souls,“that music listening and singing can have an impact on the brain…. and, in turn, could mitigate age-related cognitive decline.”

The Power of a Sing Along!

I try always to have at least one sing along during the show so that we can experience the great joy of lifting our voices together in song. This activity seems to open the emotional floodgates for those in the audience who have a long-held desire to sing. And there are many who do!

After each concert, several people will tell me they would “love to sing, but…” I can hear in that word “but” that they are not quite ready to act on this desire. To these people, I offer a few suggestions, but I ask no questions. I try to leave each person with the idea that singing is a powerful choice of a hobby that offers huge benefits, especially as we age.

I’m Ready to Take the Next Step!

Sometimes though, the person speaking is clearly ready and willing to act on their desire. And so I ask a few questions to get a sense of the unique role that singing will play in their lives. Each person has their own story about why singing is important to them. Perhaps they used to sing as a kid, but later in life, marriage and children took precedence and the dream to sing was put on hold.

Others tell me (I hear this kind of story way too often!) that a teacher or parent told them early in life that they had no voice. Or that their voice sounded awful. Or that they sang dreadfully out of tune. Some recall hearing a parent snarling in response to an expressed desire to sing, “Who do you think you are?”

There are so many stories. You may have one of your own. But consider this: later in life, we have earned the right to leave that negative baggage behind, and take a new look at what our voices can become.

Do You Know WHY You Want to Sing?

Are You Drawn to the Social Aspect of a Choir?

Singing with a choir offers the kind of connection that is hard to find in most other human endeavours. We know now from scientific study that group singing releases several powerful, “feel good” hormones in our bodies. No wonder we are so drawn to this activity. On a personal note, now and then I listen to choir music at night before I go to sleep. Sometimes tears will flow down my cheeks at the beauty of the combined sounds of human voices. Perhaps you also feel this way?

If you seek this kind of social connection, I suggest you look for a choir in your area. Listen to whatever you can hear of their work on the internet. Do they sing music that lights your musical fire? Is there a clear route for you to audition? Do you need to read music? Do you need to prepare in some other way for this audition? And if the whole idea scares you, try to lean on the old adage, “Feel the fear, but do it anyway!” Your joy in choral singing will be worth the effort!

Online Singing Groups

Another option is to find a singing group that meets online. Put these words – “online singing groups” – into the Google search engine and you may be surprised by the response! After reading some messages on my YouTube channel, Singing After 40, I realized that there was a strong need for online group singing.

Many mature people seemed to feel isolated in their quest to sing better. Now I have a free weekly warm up group that meets on Zoom to exercise their voices and briefly sing for one another. You must be over 40 to join. But all levels are welcome.

Is Yours More of a Personal Vocal Journey? Do You Want to Sing in Order to Find Out What Your Voice Can Do Now?

It is never too late to take private singing lessons. This is a more direct way to find pleasure in your personal sound. But how do you find a teacher? If there are no singing teachers in your drivable area, look for someone online – preferably a teacher who understands and enjoys working with the older voice. Then commit to two or three lessons.

In that time, you can discover two important things:

  1. Do you like the lesson experience? 
  2. Is this the right teacher for you?

Is she/he someone with whom you feel uplifted and supported as your voice evolves? Do they have insight into the older person’s voice? Keep in mind that our voices change as we age. Singing teachers who work with older singers need to know about these changes.

 Private lessons are the more costly route to take. But you may only need a few lessons to give you enough of a vocal boost so that you can work more skillfully with free online YouTube videos.

Do You Want to Test Out Your Voice in a Public Place?

If you are pretty sure that your voice is ready for another level of singing, I suggest you look for places to sing that offer karaoke nights. You could practice your song(s) at home with a backing track you can find on YouTube and then test out the song(s) in front of an audience of like-minded singers in a Karaoke club.

This is a more gutsy way of getting back into the swing of singing. But for some people, it is exactly what they need most: the joy of hearing their own unique voice in a great song in front of a responsive audience. Truly, performing for others is a thrill like none other.

A Few Words of Support for YOUR Singing Journey!

It is this more public route that one of my students, Carylle, has been enjoying. In her late 60s, she takes weekly lessons with me and then sings for local concerts and in a variety of music clubs. I asked her what she would like to share about her later-in-life singing journey. She wrote:

“Singing is a wonderful way for me to communicate with others. No matter what mood I am in, once I start into song, I am lifted. I always complete a practice or concert on a high. I will continue to sing as I keep growing older. I have also learned how important it is to keep using my voice and taking care of it. There is no age to stop singing. It is a most precious gift to share with others. I will never deny myself, or others that pleasure.” – Carylle, Montreal.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you love to sing? Have you given singing a chance or does it only exist as a dream hobby? Have you done karaoke singing? What about lessons or online classes?

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Eddy Nalls

Thank you for offering us an opportunity to share the way singing has benefitted me as I continue on life’s journey. I am presently 72 years old and I love to sing and am one who doesn’t read music. It always stopped me from trying out to join a choir.

However, when I retired I heard about a new group called Encore Creativity for Older Adults (encorecreativity.org for those 55 and older) who were forming a chorale who had participated in a study of the benefit of music in the lives of older adults that the founder Jean Kelly had participated in with the Smithsonian. The requirement to read music was not a prerequisite to participate with this group. There were about twenty or so people who joined in the DC area. That was in 2007. Now there are over 1200 singers all over the United States that participate in weekly rehearsals if offered in their area or online if not. The conductors are all professional musicians who are skilled at working with older adults In my. area we have sung at the Kennedy Center in the Opera House, at Capital One in Tysons, at Constitution Hall and other places. Some of the sings read music, some don’t but the thing we do have in common is we love music. Encore Chorale for Older Adults offers Chorale groups and Rocks groups as well as a program that works with people who are dealing with memory challenges. Some of the singers have their care partner participate with them and some of us volunteer with the program. I do volunteer and I see with a group. There are two options; one is for beginning to moderate memory challenges called Sentimental Journey Singers and the other is for those who are in later stages called Musical Memory Makers.
In addition, there are other musical activities over the year. We have summer camps throughout the United States with Chorale and/or Rocks. There are travel opportunities to destinations in the United States and outside the United States. There are cruises throughout the world where we travel and sing in places in Europe.

This organization is a gift to so many of us. I have made new friends, develop my voice skills, and feel a sense of purpose in daily living.

barbara lewis

I love your message, Eddy. Thank you!
This sounds like a profound musical gift for older singers. I’m going to do a bit of research and perhaps write about Encore Creativity for Older Adults and other online group opportunities in another article for Sixty and Me.

How wonderful that you found this group! And thank you for such a great message about it. My best to you, Barbara.

Jude

This was perfectly timed for me! I love to sing, had a good voice, but no training or vocal education. It just gave me joy. Then I developed a chronic cough that ruined my singing voice and dramatically altered my speaking voice. After years of unhelpful medical treatment, I have finally found an allergist and vocal rehab therapist and am hopeful for full healing. I signed up for your newsletter and subscribed to both your Youtube channels. I love the idea of being part of a singing and wellness community. Thanks for a great post!

barbara lewis
  • Oh my Jude! You have had quite a vocal journey! I’m happy to read that you are getting better and better! I wonder if you would like to join our free weekly warm up when you feel your voice has come to the right point? If and when, you can reach me here: barbaramusic.2011@gmail.com

My best to you! – Barbara

Winifred Kovacik

I have sung all my life in community musicals – now with a small group that entertains weekly at retirement and nursing homes. We are not a polished group but response from ones we sing for is fabulous. Recently, a listener said – could you come every week? Research tells us that even singing silently within your
mind is therapeutic – advice to all is sing, sing, sing.

barbara lewis

I agree entirely! Singing truly lights up our brain. If only we could sing more often than we argue. Wouldn’t that be a great change? Thank you for responding, Winifred. Great to hear from you!

Freda Doss

Yes sing more than argue. I need to memorise this often. Thank you

Shelley C

I could sing in my mind, I might actually get the pitch right! And would not fear judgement!!

Karen Jennings

Oh, do I love to SING!! I have sung since I was four. Never had voice lessons. I just enjoy music. Yes, karaoke is my all- time favorite, (yes even for an introvert). I understand being part of a choir but I’m not too fond of rehearsals, extra night out and someone’s strong perfume! My choir director is phenomenal! Explore your voice and have FUN! My saying is this: if you are comfortable talking, sing!

barbara lewis

Yes! Great message, Karen. I’m a bit of an introvert myself. I think singing may have drawn me out of myself as a young person. The older I get, the more I feel the profound powers of singing. Thank you for responding. Happy singing!

Londa Carter

Yes! I love to sing. I sing daily with my 92yo mom, and in the kitchen! Also love dancing and singing!!

barbara lewis

I love that, Londa! You sing daily with your Mom! That’s wonderful and so good for the soul. Thanks for responding! My best to you and your Mom! – Barbara

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The Author

Barbara Lewis is a Montreal-based singer, speaker and inspirational vocal coach who offers concerts, talks, voice lessons (in a Montreal studio and online). Barbara believes that “Singing is a powerful doorway to our happier, more peaceful selves.” Her concerts and teaching are central to this understanding.

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