How Sharp Is Your Love Radar? True or False Edition!
December is here, and the festive season isn’t just for shopping sprees – it’s also prime time for self-reflection and goal-setting, especially in the dating world. Since Black Friday, I’ve been chatting with new and long-time dating clients preparing for January’s dating surge. Amid our conversations, some popular dating misconceptions popped up.
Let’s unpack a few with a holiday spirit twist!
1. “I Can Tell If Someone Is ‘The One’ in the First 5 Minutes of a Date.”
False.
If love-at-first-sight were the rule, I’d have far fewer success stories to share! Chemistry can take time – up to three dates, in fact. So, don’t be so quick to call it quits.
2. “Men Talk Way Too Much on First Dates.”
True.
Sorry, gentlemen! Experience says this happens often (I’ve discussed this in my book, 2nd Acts: 166 Winning Strategies for Dating over 50). The good news? Second dates tend to balance things out.
3. “All the Good Men Are Married.”
False.
Take heart, ladies – there are plenty of amazing single men out there. Shift your mindset and keep looking!
4. “Everyone Lies a Little on Their Dating Profile.”
True.
Let’s call it “embellishment.” Whether it’s a slightly exaggerated gym habit or a polished travel tale, minor tweaks are common. Thankfully, data shows most people are truthful about the essentials like age, height, and weight.
5. “No One Ever Responds to My Messages Online.”
False.
If you’re not getting replies, it’s likely your approach. Canned, impersonal messages don’t cut it. Personalize and engage!
6. “He Hasn’t Shared His Feelings Yet – That’s Just His Mysterious Side.”
False.
Mysterious can be intriguing, but emotional unavailability is a red flag. If someone can’t share, ask yourself what’s holding them back.
7. “Talking About an Ex on the First Date Is No Big Deal.”
False.
Yikes! Leave ex-talk for later. The first date is about the present – building a connection and laying the groundwork for a second date.
8. “Online Dating Feels Like a Full-Time Job.”
False.
If dating apps feel like work, you’re doing it wrong. A solid strategy and focused effort (less than two hours a week!) make it manageable – and even fun.
9. “Starting Over Is Terrifying.”
True.
Re-entering the dating pool in your 50s, 60s, or beyond can be daunting, but confidence builds with practice. Four first dates, and you’ll feel unstoppable.
10. “I’ll Meet Someone ‘Organically.’”
False.
Your dream partner isn’t magically appearing at your doorstep. Over 50 percent of recent couples met online – why not you?
So, How Did You Score?
If some answers hit close to home, it’s time for a new perspective. Lisa, one of my clients, thought she’d never find love again at 68. Then, she met Roger online, and her life transformed. Love isn’t about desperation – it’s about believing in possibilities.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
What misconceptions do you have about dating? How have they affected your dating life? Are you ready to rewrite your dating story this coming year? What are you prepared to do to accomplish your goals and find companionship and love?🎄❤️
Tags Senior Dating Advice
After I broke up with someone five years ago, I pretty much gave up. I tried “Cancer-Match” and after a day or two, recognized that 90% were scammers (marine engineers working off-shore, poor grammar, wanting to communicate on What’s App) and shut down the profile straight away. A couple of the men were very nice but stated that they lived back East. I had indicated Pacific Northwest. I’m not sure how to get back onto online dating with cancer. I believe in being transparent but I can’t imagine anyone interested in a person with a potentially terminal disease. It’s a slowly progressing leukemia, and I think I’ll be around for several more years, but it even upsets my platonic male friends so I don’t discuss it. I’m setting my sights on moving to Washington, and perhaps I’ll give Meetup a shot once I’m settled. In the meantime, I’m doing my best to power through another holiday season on my own.
i’m comfortably out of the dating pool now, but i tried online dating …
the site i went to had ‘friends’ as an option of what i was looking for. everyone agreed ‘friends first’, but that always implied there would be a ‘next’, which i didn’t know, so i never signed on for promising or inferring a ‘something more later’ (i assumed we all meant Sex, so i couldn’t promise that – i didn’t know any of these people!)
i met a couple, but now i have mobility issues, so i stay off the site (happily – never did get a friend out of it all) – i got chewed out so many times for looking for friends. it was really weird to me, as it was an option the site itself offered … (and i don’t play volleyball, so meetup was out locally – that seems to be the big no-payment gig around here) … is it the age we are that has people asking to make sure sex is in the mix sometime? i’m glad to not have to have those conversations
Hi Beth—Thanks for your comments—Overall, something more later for my clients refers not to sex…but maybe a relationship later. Some people just want to get their feet wet dating so they say “friends first”…and not “dive” into the dating pool. Some may want relationships down the line.
Funny—I think about this and I was married for 24 years—did not date for 5 years—told friends and family I’d never marry again—went online dating—met some nice men —-then met a man 4 months in and married him in Italy in October. I would have said 2 years ago that this would never happen! LOL!
Happy Holidays—-Andrea
Talking about an ex–I really dislike that in a man. I feel like I’m being compared (with the ex), & if his comments about her are mostly positive–a) get over her, b) he is stuck in the past, c) he is boring. Keep looking, & find someone who wants to talk about YOU.
🇦🇺
i’ll settle for ‘to’ me – lol
1000000000% agree!
The online romance scams have pretty much ruined it for single people. I’ve been using various platforms for about a decade and have met some pretty wonderful men. But at the same time, I dealt with hundreds of fake profiles and men seeking to empty my bank account. I honestly don’t want to take the risk anymore – my plan is to get out of the house more often and meet “people” in person. I am always open to love and online dating just isn’t for me anymore.
Oops / I tapped send too soon. As I was saying…. I hope some group activities will give me an opportunity to meet new people & get to know them in a personal way instead of online.
Love it!
i have a little pup. i’m out of the ‘dating’ scene, but i gotta say, i meet SO many people with other cute pups – and some who just like mine. if you get out more to ‘meet’ people, a dog can be a great judge of character, and little dogs are fairly easy … you go!
YES! Besth, dogs are men magnets—I have a golden retriever and before I got remarried I met men just walking my dog by the beach—even more so that dog parks! And I bet your little pup attacts lots of attention….
And, if you ever think of doing online dating, make sure to include you and your puppy–your response rate will be high.
Happy holidays–Andrea
Hi Lana–
I think getting out of the house and meeting people if you have the right avenues is a terrific idea—
But, where online dating was a chaotic mess back in 2000-2012—so many scams, online dites figuring it all out—–now in the 2020’s there is a substantial difference—especially in the top 25 dating sites. Much verification. So, the stuff you ran into a while back may not be an issue anymore—
You know, there’s over 1400 dating sites and app—so the ones I’d highy recommend that you STAY AWAY from are the microsites. Those would be some of the smaller sites such as for yoga, meditation, conservatives, liberals, hikers—nothing wrong with any of those categories—just don’t ever use these types of sites to date. Limited on people, free thus scams.
Happy holidays and thanks for commenting–I always love hearing what people have to say—Warmly, Andrea