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What’s Really Important? Finding Your Purpose in Life After 60

By Betty Withrow December 13, 2020 Mindset

How can you tell what’s important and what is not? All day and night you have choices to make about the signals that stream in, creating feelings and thoughts. They demand that you either accept or reject the ideas that they represent.

Family situations, relationships with your neighbors, something at work that needs to be handled or your own feelings and thoughts… or all of the above. It’s usually a combination of things you care about and things you don’t care about, but have to deal with anyway.

Stop for a Moment and Look at the Flow of Signals

What responses are being requested? Are they in alignment with your true priorities in life? Are you being asked to step out of your comfort one? Who is served by your going there?

Is what is being asked of you out of alignment with your true values? Or, are you being asked for your own best wisdom? Who will benefit from the actions you take or do not take?

It’s a challenge to make the distinctions, since there are so many types of responsibility. Each day requires changing your point of view at least a few times to accommodate the needs of the moment.

Ask yourself what purpose is being served by each of the signals. This way, they will become easier to decipher and prioritize. What is your role in the train of events? If you are being asked to play a role that is out of touch with your values, in order to make things work for someone else, how much value does that add to your life and that of those you care about?

When is the Right Time to React?

There are times when it’s best to just let sleeping dogs lie. At other times, a sharp distinction needs to be drawn and you need to decide whether you point it out to others or not. When you are clear in your own mind about your feelings, you can adapt your responses to create the result you desire, without getting caught up in other people’s processes.

Have a look at who is doing the asking. What will happen to them – and to you – because of how you placed your priorities?

You are the one who will make the priorities that shape your life and relationships. When you are clear within yourself about your values, you can see that the urgency that is often projected about small things is an energy drain.

Be Aware of the Risks of “False Urgency”

False urgency drains away mental and emotional energy and keeps true solutions from being generated. Think about what true inspiration is like. It’s not urgent.

True inspiration is gentle and has plenty of time to unfold. It has room for everyone. It just appears, without asking you to do anything except notice it.

As we gain spiritual awareness later in life, we can let go of the need to engage with some of the urgency that others project. We can cultivate a calm perspective. Life does contain truly urgent situations, but they are relatively few.

Don’t Forget to Look at the Big Picture

Taking a larger view of things serves you and those around you. It makes the world a better place. You can be an island of calm where true solutions are generated and save your energy for things that are more meaningful and long-lasting. It’s more efficient to look for the long view of things and let the moment unfold.

What is your purpose in doing what you are doing today? Do you have opportunities to make small changes that expand your wisdom? What choices can you make to improve your live and expand your role in your community?

Make that First Little Change and See What Opens Up for You

Your first change can be as simple as not telling people what you think until you are sure they are ready to hear you. It could be that you have a chance to let the moment ripen until the other person is ready to hear what you have to say.

You can be the example who doesn’t say a word, but, instead makes things work. You can let others become curious about what you are doing. Eventually, people will ask you questions, ready to listen to what you have to say. You will have silently demonstrated your priorities without explaining anything.

It’s Time to Make Room in Your Life for Your True Self

When you make room for yourself and nourish your own values, at the time when you are required to be flexible and change your ideas or responses in some way, it’s not a big deal. You already understand that you are bigger than the thing in front of you. You are more important than the matter at hand.

The moment opens up and gets both bigger and smaller. You have what it takes to light up the time. It’s another moment that contains the seed of better understanding and you can step into it with confidence.

The gift of time allows you to see the opening in the moment and, rather than rushing through it, you see the opportunities it presents and are calm and flexible enough to act on them.

Then you can select the action that is best for you and make the most of everything that the moment represents.

Do you agree that life after 60 should be a time for aligning all of your actions with your values? What would you do with your life if you knew that you could not fail? Let’s start a conversation.

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The Author

Betty Withrow is a creativity and life purpose coach, helping artistic and professional women to find a deeper engagement with their life processes, to use the skills and experience we have in creating a dynamic third-act life. Clarity of purpose, vivid life experiences, and a true sense of legacy are her special interests. She is the author of “Prevail: Seven Keys to Create a Personal Victory”. Visit her website http://www.bettyofbigsur.com

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