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What Is It That You REALLY Want on This Side of 50?

By Leslie Moon November 12, 2022 Mindset

When I began to contemplate the idea of retiring from my career, I experienced anxiety around the idea of not working every day. What would I do all day? How would I spend my time?

I was lucky enough to have been in a career and with a company that I absolutely loved. However, my job as a behavior analyst working with children on the autism spectrum and their families was becoming less joyful for me for a variety of reasons. I was experiencing chronic back pain. And I was at a point in my life where I wanted to spend all of my “kid” time with my grandchildren.

Still, seeing the grands was not going to be a daily event. So, how would I spend my days if I left my job?

I reflected on this question and decided that this would be the time for me to do the thing I’d wanted to do since I was a little girl. I would write.

Specifically, I would create content for women like myself who were trying to figure out who they were and what they wanted to do on this side of 50.

It’s Been a Journey! I’ve Made Mistakes and Learned Some Things!

I started Life Balance After 50 and began writing blog posts and live content centered around:

  • it’s not too late and we are not too old to do big things! To go back to school, start a business, write a book, and the list goes on;
  • the role that our core beliefs play in how we live our lives and what we decide to do or not do
  • the importance of a growth versus a fixed mindset in all we do.

Although this content and these topics were helpful and of interest to my community of women, this summer I took a different turn. I called it my “summer of being present.” I made it my goal to live “in the moment” no matter what I was doing. To see the joy and beauty rather than to worry about all of the other things I “should” be doing. And my community loved this.

Because, many of us in this community of women aren’t necessarily looking to make huge changes! We are just looking to find our joy and passion in each day and spend at least part of our day doing the thing that brings us just that!

For Some of Us, Changing a Small Habit Is a Game Changer

Many of us in this community are just looking to have some structure and control over where our days take us. We often spend our days “reacting” to the needs of others in our environment.

Carving out and scheduling “me” time that you honor can help with this. Scheduling time each day to reflect, mediate or journal. Time to take an outdoor walk every day. Time to read for pleasure.

Creating or changing a new habit can have a domino effect on our days and weeks when we honor it and stick with it.

Others Might Want to Look at the Big Picture

For these women, reflecting on how our priorities and values may have changed through the years is helpful. Maybe you want to think about what your mission statement is on this side of 50. This can provide you with a big picture look at each day as you move forward.

Having a good idea of what your priorities are can help you decide who and what to say “no” to so that you are spending more time on the things and people that matter.

Some Reflection Ideas to Get You Started

Taking quiet, focused time to really reflect and journal out your ideas is key during this process. As you consider the reflections listed, it is important that you do NOT censor yourself. Write down everything that comes into your mind. This will provide you with invaluable information.

  1. Picture your ideal day and week and go into great detail. What activities are you doing? Where? With whom? What are you wearing? Write down everything that comes into your mind. This reflection should be done periodically.
  2. What are your top three priority areas? How much of your day and week is spent on these? Are you happy with the time that you give to these areas? If not, what changes can be made so that you have more time for the things that you WANT to spend your time on?
  3. How have your priorities/values changed throughout the years?
  4. If you could spend two days doing anything you wanted and money was no object, how would you spend those two days?
  5. How do you want to be remembered?

I encourage you to take time to reflect on how you’d like your days to look as you move forward. Not all of us want to make major life changes, but we do deserve to have time dedicated each day to do something that is just for us at this stage of the game.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What changes in your days and weeks would you like to see happen on this side of 50? Big? Small? What small habit change would you like to make? What is standing in your way when you think about making these changes?

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Ingrid

I suppose wouldbe good to exercise more butIm just so tired! However I live right beside a forest with walking tracks so its super easy TBH. I’m currently studying an MBA (I’m 60). Not sure exactly where it will lead but it will be helpful for my business and also transitioning out of my business. I’d like to do p-t work when I retire. Maybe coaching or working on a Board. I’m making an effort to catch up with friends more frequently – and that is a joy! I have an AirBnB that is currently on hold (empty) due to being too busy with work and study but once I’ve retired, I could run it every day. It could be fun to do a slow campervan trip around the country. It could be enjoyable to support migrants with english language practice. I hope the MBA will give me more confidence. 90+% of people say it is transformational. I could do with being transformed!! I wonder what they mean… I guess I will find out! I hope with my business background and MBA, that I’ll be able to hep out a volunteer or not-for-profit.

Ingrid

But to answer question..
Small habits:
– exercise x 3 or 4x pw
– meditation
– gratitude x everyday
– remembering friends birthdays
– inviting friends out/doing things with friends
– learning something new at least once pw
– goal setting
– make the effort to make one or two new friends each year while maintaining my core group of friends
– think about spending money instead of hoarding money
– try and think of a new experience to try every month – and then do it
– invite someone over for a boardgame x6 times per year. (Me and my neighbours have talked about it but not done it.)
– go out on my e-bike x4 times per month
I guess when I write this down, there are actually lots of small new habits I could make!

The Author

Leslie is the founder of Life Balance After 50 where she uses her background in counseling and behavior analysis to help women navigate their goals and dreams after 50. She created a free mini workbook along with a guide and a full-length workbook for women who are looking to redefine and find joy and purpose in their second half of life. Contact Leslie at Leslie@lifebalanceafter50.com.

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