Have you ever come to a point in your life where you feel something has to change and yet you don’t have a clue where to begin?
It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the enormity of it all. This is especially true when you’re convinced you can’t do it without a big plan. No wonder it’s impossible to see a starting place.
My thoughts on any kind of change are always to begin with baby steps. Morning rituals are a great way to begin. They can set the tone and flavour for how your day unfolds. Starting with a flurry of activity with no time to prepare for the day ahead can escalate into one of the following. Chasing your tail, difficulty in keeping focused or unnecessary irritation. Personally, I can turn into a right old grump when things go awry.
Beginning your days peacefully and consciously will encourage and enable you to embrace all you have to do with ease. Life flows much more smoothly. Just a little pre-planning and clear intentions can create a day that flows beautifully and easily.
As we wake each morning, our minds are in a more impressionable state than they are during the rest of the day. We can learn a lot by observing our own thoughts and behaviours first thing in the morning. Taking note of what you say to yourself as you open your eyes in the morning can be an enlightening experience.
Do you start your day by mentally searching through it and imagining all the difficulties you might encounter? Do you think about how to avoid them or how to get everything done? This may be normal to you because you never thought there was another way. I bet you don’t even consider whether what you’re thinking is fearful or based on negative previous experiences.
Do you rush headlong into your day with a mental list of ALL that has to be done? How about considering the amazing ability we all have to creatively think up new ways of doing things? If we don’t expect anything uplifting, out of the ordinary or just plain good, well, we’re never going to be disappointed.
Being judgmental, suspicious, or critical of what we want for ourselves is often considered wise and prudent. It’s supposed to stop us from making mistakes! That nagging little voice is so familiar it’s almost comforting. We’ve come to trust its ‘reality’.
Expectations are the breeding ground for miracles. In order to change entrenched patterns, we must learn to practice new habits, thoughts, feelings and actions.
And yes, I totally agree, that may seem a lot at first glance. However, the good news is that if you change a habit, the rest of the patterns begin to shift on their own!
The alternative is to keep doing the same things over and over, expecting a different outcome. That’s the definition of insanity! So, to get a different outcome we must PRACTICE doing things differently. It’s okay to do it ‘scared and imperfect’. Unless you have a will of iron there are likely to be times you forget. That’s okay – it’s called being human!
How you feel begins to change at the start of your days. You’ll notice how your well-being affects circumstances and people in your life too. Over time, your practice becomes as much a part of your life as breathing and eating.
Instead of turning on the radio or television for the news or checking emails first thing, why not take just five minutes to set up your day. Do it while the kettle boils for your morning cuppa.
Once you consciously begin to create your day, little unexplainable things happen. Your daily tasks become easier. Frustrations fade away. You begin to train your mind to seek out what feels good in your life.
How you feel about yourself improves because it’s like you suddenly have choices. You begin to recognise other possibilities of what and how you do things.
Stress and anxiety are heightened a lot of the time because we focus on what isn’t good. Demands make us feel as if we don’t have the ability to cope with everything. Developing a gratitude practice and recognising the little good things in life sends our unconscious mind looking for little gems all throughout the day.
As we deepen our practice, we begin to consciously notice what is so good about our life. This begins to reduce our anxiety and creates space in our minds to have new thoughts and inspiration.
Gratitude also raises our energy levels and strengthens our ability to notice more good things are happening because we see we are actually attracting them to us.
Start by imagining a way you would like to BE and feel it. You might decide to feel happier or more confident, daring or inspired. If you get easily rattled or annoyed, you might choose to be peaceful and centred or unflappable.
Imagine the activities of your day and see yourself doing them in ways that would feel really good. If you can’t visualise them, just think of your routine tasks, conversations, encounters and imagine how it would feel if everything was running smoothly.
Now use how you’d like to feel, and extend it into an intention for the day. For example, say:
Sometimes life events feel disappointing and expectations are dashed. It’s a natural response to experience feelings of being miserable and let down. However, did you know it’s impossible to hold a positive thought and a negative thought in your mind at any one time? So, given a choice, which one will you prefer?
Generations before us have taught us well. Now you know differently so you can choose differently. You ARE the one with the power over your own thoughts! So be who you are and let go of the idea that your circumstances have to dictate the way you feel.
You are so much more powerful than the events in your life. Get an accountability partner. Buddy up with friends or create your own healing ritual. You can change your life when you change the way you look at it.
How do you feel about taking baby steps to change your day? Do you have your own little morning rituals to make your day flow smoothly? Please join in the conversation.
Tags Reinventing Yourself
I find so little of this applies to my life. I’m 66, still working and running a company full time plus, no spouse, no kids, and must be at my desk by 6:30 am, usually for 12 hours or so daily. As it is, I’m up earlier and earlier just to start on time. No time for a morning cuppa or meditating or planning (that’s done before I sleep and finish work at night). And yes, thanks to Covid, I’m working at home. Work? What else would I do? Friends — where would I meet any? Family? My folks are gone; my aunts and uncles have all passed; my two sisters live 1500 miles away and have lives of their own. So it’s just me and the cat :)
I’m 64 and just now learning to get into the habit of thinking more positively- this doesn’t come naturally to me. Mornings are the vulnerable time so I try to take just a few seconds at least to get into a more positive mindset which is very helpful. Otherwise I’m teary and a wreck!
How do you handle waking from soul crushing dreams? They seem to set the tone for the day.
My daughter has terrible dreams, so I asked her how she handles her mornings. She says that after she reflects on the possible meaning of the dream, she imagines it’s a balloon and visualizes herself letting it go, and it is floating away. If it’s too frightening, she skips the reflection.
Thanks I will give it a try.
Thank you for reminding me to alter my negative thoughts that I wake up to every morning. I ruminate about all the negative decisions I made in my life. I know I can think myself down into a black hole but I try to say delete.
I absolutely will build this into my day. Cause I find my morning thoughts are negative